Executive Coaching: Power vs. Force (part 3)

In part one we examined how we can slide down the slippery slope from “power to” (competence) into “power over” (domination) and in part two we showed you some examples. 

Part 1

Part 2

PART THREE: The good news is that we can restore, and help sustain our power by shedding the self-defeating “ego structures” that show up in our lives as:

• Defenses – what or whom am I defended against?
• Habitual Patterns – what behaviors are so ingrained that they’re under my personal radar, and get in my way?
• Triggers and Reactions – what do I always react to instinctively versus taking the time to consider a wise response?
• Avoidances – what makes me so uncomfortable that I can’t or won’t address it?
  

James Flaherty’s Integral Coaching model points to how we can concentrate and focus our authentic power by paying attention to:

1. Timing: When our interests, talents and energy match the support we can muster from others and events as they unfold naturally, and without effort.

2. Yielding: Including the forces of life within our intention, using their impetus instead of trying to overcome them – “going with the flow” instead of “pushing the river.”

3. Discipline: Staying focused, remaining patient, desiring one thing, eliminating the inessential, letting go of our personal likes, persisting in our practices, and reminding ourselves what’s important, not only what’s urgent.

4. Leakage: Power can “leak out” (even hemorrhage) through: unfinished business from the past, negative emotions, compulsions and obsessions, distractions, procrastinations, and worry.

QUESTIONS TO CONSIDER:

1. In what ways are you powerful?

2. In what ways are you forceful?
3. What is your primary way of losing concentration and focus of your personal power? Why is that?
4. What one thing could you do right now to help you cultivate authentic personal power, the competence to claim highest level of emotional intelligence, as well as embody and sustain your personal potential?

Sandy Hogan is an executive coach headquartered in Tucson, Arizona. Through integral coaching, teaching, writing and speaking she is dedicated to “evoking of others the highest in themselves.” She infuses compassion and creativity into her coaching style and philosophy, working with clients’ particular leadership issues, backgrounds, disciplines, careers, goals, and views of life. Her clients are corporate executives, management professionals, non-profit and community leaders, and people who find themselves in the midst of major transitions. More on Sandy >

Executive Coaching: Power vs. Force (part2)

In part one we examined how we can slide down the slippery slope from “power to” (competence) into “power over” (domination). In other words, we can move from effectiveness into ineffectiveness, from operating from groundedness to operating from ungroundedness.  How often we move back and forth, and how long we’re able to sustain “power” are good indicators of high emotional intelligence.

The charts below, adapted from Dr. David Hawkins’ book, Power vs. Force, show an example of how each EnneaType’s strengths can easily slip in to less-effective behaviors (force) that knock us off center and disable our connection to our authentic power:

 One: The Perfectionist

Power	Force
Impartial (I am non-judgmental)	Righteous (I am superior)
Surrendering	Worrying
Responsible	Guilty

Two: The Helper

Power	Force
Helpful (I assist you without attachment)	Meddling (I insist on offering you assistance)
Devoted	•       Possessive
Empathetic	Pitying

Three: The Achiever

Power	Force
Encouraging (I facilitate achievements)	•       Promoting (I “advertise” achievements)
Diplomatic	Deceptive
Praising	Flattering

Four: The Individualist

Power	Force
Appreciative (I am content with what I have)	Envious (I want what you have)
Egalitarian	•       Elitist
Selective	Exclusive

Five: The Observer

Power	Force
Detached (I don’t have an attachment to the outcome)	•       Removed (I refuse to engage)
Aware	Preoccupied
Thoughtful	Pedantic

Six: The Loyalist

Power	Force
Courageous (I will do it no matter what)	•       Self-doubting (I don’t think I can do it, no matter what)
Equal	Superior
Loyal	Chauvinistic

Seven: The Enthusiast

Power	Force
Abundant (I have enough)	•       Excessive (I want more)
Enlivening	Exhausting
Spontaneous	Impulsive

Eight: The Challenger

Power	Force
Powerful (I invite you to follow)	Forceful (I demand that you follow)
Authoritative	•       Dogmatic
Confident	Arrogant

Nine: The Mediator

Power	Force
Reliant (I can rely on you to help me)	Dependent (I can’t do it myself)
Conciliatory	•       Stubborn
Serene	Dull

In part three we will part three we will examine how we can restore, and help sustain our power by shedding the self-defeating “ego structures” that show up in our lives.

Sandy Hogan is an executive coach headquartered in Tucson, Arizona. Through integral coaching, teaching, writing and speaking she is dedicated to “evoking of others the highest in themselves.” She infuses compassion and creativity into her coaching style and philosophy, working with clients’ particular leadership issues, backgrounds, disciplines, careers, goals, and views of life. Her clients are corporate executives, management professionals, non-profit and community leaders, and people who find themselves in the midst of major transitions. More on Sandy >

Executive Coaching: Power vs. Force (part1)

Recently, I’ve been integrating several integral models in my executive coaching work. Specifically, Dr. David Hawkins’ work with Power vs. Force, James Flaherty’s model of concentrating power, and Riso and Hudson’s “level of development” tradition of the Enneagram.

Essentially, we can slide down the slippery slope from “power to” (competence) into “power over” (domination). In other words, we can move from effectiveness into ineffectiveness, from operating from groundedness to operating from ungroundedness. Below is a chart that distinguishes power from force, according to David Hawkins:

POWER	FORCE
Is self-evident and not arguable, therefore not subject to proof	Is arguable and therefore requires constant defense and proof
Power “to” (competence)	Power “over” (domination)
Associated with the whole	Associated with the partial or incomplete
Its effect is to unify	Its effect is to polarize
Does not move against opposition	Automatically creates counter-force to push against
Requires no justification	Must always be justified
Energizes, gives forth, supplies and supports	Has an insatiable appetite and constantly consumes
Is still, a standing field	Is a movement, tries to get from here to there
Arises from meaning, motive and principal	Arises from transient goals; when reached, the emptiness of meaninglessness remains
Associated with health, vitality and life	Associated with sickness, disease and death

In the Enneagram model, the “stress points,” or direction of Disintegration moves us from “power” to “force.” Conversely, the “growth points,” or direction of Integration moves from “force” back to “power.” We move back and forth from “power” to “force” all the time, in different situations, and with different people.  How often we move back and forth, and how long we’re able to sustain “power” are good indicators of high emotional intelligence.

Growth "Force to Growth": 1>7>5>8>2>4>1  3>6>9>3

Stress Points "Growth to Force": 1>4>2>8>5>7>1  3>9>6>3

Enneagram Descriptions: http://trinityperformancegroup.blogspot.com/2011/09/enneagram-descriptions.html

In part two we will examine how the basic fears of each type therefore erode “power” by our unconscious strategies to avoid feeling the fear and how we shift back and forth between "power" and "force."

Sandy Hogan is an executive coach headquartered in Tucson, Arizona. Through integral coaching, teaching, writing and speaking she is dedicated to “evoking of others the highest in themselves.” She infuses compassion and creativity into her coaching style and philosophy, working with clients’ particular leadership issues, backgrounds, disciplines, careers, goals, and views of life. Her clients are corporate executives, management professionals, non-profit and community leaders, and people who find themselves in the midst of major transitions. More on Sandy >

Enneagram Descriptions

The Enneagram is a powerful and dynamic personality system that describes nine distinct and fundamentally different patterns of thinking, feeling, and acting. Each of the nine patterns is based on an explicit perceptual filter. This filter determines the focus of your attention and how you direct your energy. Underneath each of the nine patterns is a basic proposition, or belief, about what you need in life for survival and satisfaction.

Type 1 - The Perfectionist

Believes you must be good and right to be worthy.

Consequently, Perfectionists are conscientious, responsible,

improvement-oriented, and self-controlled, but also can

be critical, resentful, and self-judging.

Strengths: Hard working; responsible; consistent; logical;

improvement – oriented

Difficult: Resentful; non-adaptable; critical; controlling;

judging

Type 2 – The Helper

Believes you must give fully to others to be loved.

Consequently, Helpers are caring, helpful, supportive,

and relationship-oriented, but also can be prideful, overly

intrusive, and demanding.

Strengths: Relationships; responsible; supportive; likable;

Caring

Difficult: Boundaries; privilege; indirect; intense; difficulty

saying no

Type 3 – The Achiever

Believes you must accomplish and succeed to be loved.

Consequently, Performers are industrious, fast-paced,

goal focused, and efficiency- oriented, but also can be

inattentive to feelings, impatient, and image-driven.

Strengths: Confident; high energy; efficient, overcomes

problems; results oriented     

Difficult: Missing your own feelings; moving into action too

quickly; wanting too much attention from others

Type 4 – The Individualist

Believes you must obtain the longed for ideal relationship

or situation to be loved. Consequently, Romantics are

idealistic, deeply feeling, empathetic, authentic to self, but

also dramatic, moody, and sometimes self-absorbed.

Strengths: Inspiring; creative; authentic; emotional depth;

expressive; intuitive

Difficult: “Nothing” is good enough, rejected by others;

feeling different from others

Type 5 – The Observer

Believes you must protect yourself from a world that

demands too much and gives too little to assure life.

Consequently, Observers are self-sufficiency seeking, nondemanding,

analytic/thoughtful, and unobtrusive, but also

can be withholding, detached, and overly private.

Strengths: Scholarly; respectful; objective; expert;

Competent

Difficult: Isolation; detached from feelings; feelings of

intrusion; seeing requests as demands

Type 6 – The Loyalist

Believes you must gain protection and security in a

hazardous world you just can’t trust. Consequently, Loyal

Skeptics are themselves trustworthy, inquisitive, good

friends, and questioning, but also can be overly doubtful,

accusatory, and fearful.

Strengths: Thoughtful; warm; protective; devoted to others;

fair; sensitive

Difficult: Inaction; fear; wanting more proof before

decisions; pessimistic

Type 7 – The Enthusiast

Believes you must keep life up and open to assure a

good life. Consequently, Epicures are optimistic, upbeat,

possibility- and pleasure-seeking, and adventurous, but also

can be pain-avoidant, uncommitted, and self-serving.

Strengths: Curious; upbeat; engaging; quick thinker; positive

Difficult: Impulsive; unfocused; avoid pain; self-absorbed

Type 8 – The Protector

Believes you must be strong and powerful to assure protection

and regard in a tough world. Consequently, Protectors are

justice-seeking, direct, strong, and action-oriented, but also

overly impactful, excessive, and sometimes impulsive.

Strengths: Strength; direct; assertive; inspiring; leadership;

protective of others

Difficult: Sharing fear; losing control; lowering energy or

presence; demanding

Type 9 – The Mediator

Believes that to be loved and valued you must blend in

and go along to get along. Consequently, Mediators are

self-forgetting, harmony-seeking, comfortable, and steady,

but also conflict avoidant and sometimes stubborn.

Strengths: Harmonious; easy-going; caring; accepting;

mediating; trusting

Difficult: Going along to get along; saying no; conflict;

forgetting oneself; delayed decisions