Executive Coaching: Power vs. Force (part 3)

In part one we examined how we can slide down the slippery slope from “power to” (competence) into “power over” (domination) and in part two we showed you some examples. 

Part 1

Part 2

PART THREE: The good news is that we can restore, and help sustain our power by shedding the self-defeating “ego structures” that show up in our lives as:

• Defenses – what or whom am I defended against?
• Habitual Patterns – what behaviors are so ingrained that they’re under my personal radar, and get in my way?
• Triggers and Reactions – what do I always react to instinctively versus taking the time to consider a wise response?
• Avoidances – what makes me so uncomfortable that I can’t or won’t address it?
  

James Flaherty’s Integral Coaching model points to how we can concentrate and focus our authentic power by paying attention to:

1. Timing: When our interests, talents and energy match the support we can muster from others and events as they unfold naturally, and without effort.

2. Yielding: Including the forces of life within our intention, using their impetus instead of trying to overcome them – “going with the flow” instead of “pushing the river.”

3. Discipline: Staying focused, remaining patient, desiring one thing, eliminating the inessential, letting go of our personal likes, persisting in our practices, and reminding ourselves what’s important, not only what’s urgent.

4. Leakage: Power can “leak out” (even hemorrhage) through: unfinished business from the past, negative emotions, compulsions and obsessions, distractions, procrastinations, and worry.

QUESTIONS TO CONSIDER:

1. In what ways are you powerful?

2. In what ways are you forceful?
3. What is your primary way of losing concentration and focus of your personal power? Why is that?
4. What one thing could you do right now to help you cultivate authentic personal power, the competence to claim highest level of emotional intelligence, as well as embody and sustain your personal potential?

Sandy Hogan is an executive coach headquartered in Tucson, Arizona. Through integral coaching, teaching, writing and speaking she is dedicated to “evoking of others the highest in themselves.” She infuses compassion and creativity into her coaching style and philosophy, working with clients’ particular leadership issues, backgrounds, disciplines, careers, goals, and views of life. Her clients are corporate executives, management professionals, non-profit and community leaders, and people who find themselves in the midst of major transitions. More on Sandy >