Sales Leadership

Soft Skills for Sales People…Really??

I recently had a conversation with another executive coach and she posed the question, “Why should sales people and sales managers focus on soft skills?” As a life-long sales person, my mind raced a hundred miles a minute as I wanted to shout out all the reasons WHY this makes sense. Instead, I remained calm and decided to get to the root of this question, as I was intrigued with the perception this person had about sales people.


I suspect other people who have never sold before hold the same perceptions the executive coach did, most likely because they do not understand what a sales person has to do day in and day out to be successful. I remember my own experiences and that of my former colleagues as we were tasked with growing our territory 25% or more each year, essentially doubling the size of our business every 3.5 years. While we certainly were rewarded for accomplishing our goals, we also felt penalized every time our territory was annually reduced or cut by a sales manager, even if we exceeded all objectives. 


I remember my stress and that of my peers if we were not at our quota number by Christmas.  Not only did it mean managing and balancing family time with work over the holidays, it also meant managing “your manager” and clients by trying to place sales orders before the end of the year. Oh yes, at stake on top of reaching quota was also earning a year-end bonus, incentive trips, and of course just holding on to your job for another year. 

Most of my sales career was spent “turning around” underperforming territories. Maybe it was my positivity, persistence and confidence that allowed me to overcome the words “no” countless times while forging ahead.  Needless to say, each time I heard the words “no” it was all about managing my own emotions and the pain rejection can bring.  As my territories grew to top performers, it was about shifting my attention and energy from selling to “selling and protecting” as other sales reps were now hunting within my business.  

For me and many other sales reps, the work is about managing your resources, as most of us were paid on small or zero salaries, and had to manage “sales and commissions” month to month.  Of course there were the times that clients moved, retired or simply were not satisfied with the products, all which meant losing commissions and income.  Celebrations were rare, as I was often reminded that you’re only as good as your last sale.

Managing success also became an important skill to master. I’m certain I failed on some fronts, but will always live in gratitude for excellent parents and a wonderfully grounded wife who helped me manage this.  Some of my peers were not so fortunate, and their careers and families have suffered dearly, despite their success in sales.

I always remember the wisdom I received from a sales trainer early on in my career.  She clearly stated that most sales representatives are and will always be the only interface your client will ever have with your company. I know this is true, as I remember the stories of previous sales reps in my territories shared by both clients and co-workers about the impact they made (good or bad).

So, back to the question I received earlier on why coaching and soft skills matter to sales people. The best and brightest sales people are the ones that manage through conflict and difficulty while managing their success.  They do more than just “go over or around obstacles.” The best sales people play to their strengths, and also manage those “shadow sides” and are aware of the obstacles they create.  They connect on all three domains: Thinking, Feeling and Instincts, and stay present to the moment. 

Soft skills are often the most challenging skills to develop, as this growth requires a person to develop awareness, acceptance, take new actions and adhere to practices that enhance their own inner observer. In my experience as a life-long sales person, certified executive coach, author and consultant, the one element that is missing in most sales training programs is the focus on soft skills.  Very few tools provide attention and energy to grow our soft skills.  Yet, you can see by the chart below, it’s the individuals that master these that have the greatest impact on an organization.

Two Factors Define our EQ

• Intrapersonal Intelligence: Ability to understand, accept, and manage oneself

• Interpersonal Intelligence: Capacity to work effectively with a wide variety of other people

Regardless of occupation, soft skills matter.  As a life-long sales person and executive coach, I’m glad I can observe the difference they have made in my own personal experiences and growth…

John Brambert is the President of Trinity Performance Group, a team of seasoned Executive Coaches trained in the leading worldwide coaching programs. Trinity Performance Group’s goal is to provide a wide range of executive coaching, leadership and team development, and related services to our clients.  See More in John>